Who comes to BBM?
Just about every type of person you can imagine! You’ll find men who strongly identify with the bear community, men who are part of the leather scene, and plenty of others who aren’t a part of any scene. There are practiced fetishists, guys who are curious about fetish/kink, and lots of others who are mostly vanilla. There are big boys and skinny boys and everybody in between. You’ll find a very broad range of ages. There are guys that come just to hangout and socialize, others who come for the dance and pool parties, and still others who come for the after hours parties. But most men come for a combination of those things. Some folks come with their significant others, some come with a group of friends, and plenty of others come on their own and make new friends while they’re here. We are all about supporting newcomers and single men!
What if I’m not a bear?
At least half the attendees are not bears. You only have to be yourself in order to come! One of the coolest things about BBM is that it brings together so many different kinds of men of different shapes and sizes.
What if I’m not a leather guy?
Another half of the attendees are also not into leather or fetish/kink. Just be you! BBM brings together so many different interests, we just suggest that you remain open but also be true to yourself.
What do you mean by “Mayhem”?
We’re not going to deny that in 2010 when we were coming up with a good name for a run, we just liked the ring of it. “Bears” is self explanatory. “Bikers” is the Leather guys. “Mayhem” is code for all the fun we have.
UK /ˈmeɪ.hem/ US /ˈmeɪ.hem/
So, we definitely have security on staff, don’t worry about that! BBM is a safe and welcoming environment with at least a bit of decorum. BUT(T), we hope that everyone enjoys themselves according to their own definition. Or, according to our definition: acting like kids in a candy shop!
What if I’m shy?
You won’t be the only guest that is shy. We try to make sure all of our guests have a good experience whether they are outgoing, reserved, or even shy. We also know that the guests at BBM are pretty much all really nice, friendly and approachable men. We see them meeting new people all the time and making new friends, each and every year. If you are even just a bit open and approachable or willing to say hi, you will very likely meet lots of men. This year, we have little ways for new guests to easily identify themselves as first timers if they would like; for instance, a special colored lanyard or colored run pass. If you choose to participate, then repeat guests are sure to be *even more* welcoming. Additionally, there are plenty of low key events throughout the weekend like a cuddle room, bingo, tours, lectures, and shopping opportunities.
Will people talk to me?
Absolutely! You will find that the other attendees at BBM are, by and large, a *VERY* friendly and welcoming group of men. After all, most of them are coming for the same reasons you are! They want to hang out, meet new friends, catch up with old ones, and just have fun. If you’re new to BBM, you will have an option to identify yourself as a newbie (like a different colored lanyard or run pass). If you choose to do so, you will find that guys will be even more likely to chat with you. Plus, there are a lot of smaller events throughout the weekend that are a bit more low key and social. Remember, Mayhem is just one part of the event name.
Will people be like me?
Considering we have every type of guy imaginable attending, we can almost assure you that there will be people like you. You’ll find: men who look like you, men who think like you, men as shy or outgoing as you, and, very likely, men with similar interests as you. You may even find yourself extremely attracted to some of them! Part of the fun at BBM is meeting and getting to know so many cool guys over the weekend, connecting with them, and even making friends well beyond the event.
Will anyone sit with me at meals?
More importantly, will YOU sit with *us*? Depending on the type of pass you buy, there are up to seven meals included in your weekend. At most meals the tables have six to ten chairs. That means there is a lot of opportunity to sit with other new, whether old friends or future ones. BBM goes to every possible extent to make sure we never have a party of one (unless you really want to sit by yourself—we totally respect your choice). You will find our lunch room to be unlike any high school you attended! Our guests WANT you to sit with them and may even invite you to sit with them. Some of them even go a bit out of their way to fill all the seats at their table, especially if you look friendly.
Not everyone is a loner.
What if I don’t like to dance?
That will hardly matter. We have men who *love* to dance and look forward to those parties during the weekend. They have the moves! Others? Well, not so much but they still love to dance regardless. Then, we have those who love to stand on the sides and enjoy just watching good looking men, perhaps you’ll join us? If we haven’t described you yet, no worries! We have other events such as: karaoke, hanging out areas, cuddle rooms, the vendor market, and places to nosh. So, basically, what we’re trying to say: no worries! You’re not going to have to study Pee Wee Herman’s “Tequila” before coming to BBM … but if you want, we can certainly help:
What if I don’t like after hours parties?
Not everyone does; in fact, some guests don’t attend the after parties at all! There are so many things going on all day, it’s almost impossible to do everything. Plus, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.… As much as we encourage people to stay open, we want you to be true to yourself, and be comfortable. There is absolutely no pressure! And, while guys will make all kinds of recommendations and may ask what you are up to later, no one will judge your choices.
(Well, almost no one…)